I have like 100 Dog tricks up my fur but nothing works. I have tried hiding under the bed. I have tried fake sleeping. I even tried acting dead once but my human is least concerned. She drags me to the washroom (each and every time) and applies those fancy foamy things called shampoo on me. Argh!!! Even my best puppy voice(which is hard to make once you’re a grown-up dog) doesn’t melt her heart.

Word Of Caution: Do not try to act like a Stuffed toy amidst all other Soft toys. You not only can’t deceive the human, but she also makes sure to wash those soft toys in the washing machine. Horrifying right? It’s like if I am going down, I am taking you all down with me and I am not that type of dog. I dog swear!